My bad incident with obama
so it was a day in 2016 i was bored so went to washington dc with my couple of friends, they wre mark and ray. we get ticket for white house and are waiting at the door for tour guide to come... but he didnt.... so we snuck away from the group and past the secret service and got into the white house through a vent and unlocked side door from inside for my friends to come in (mind you I had to activate my inner badassery to do this) so we go and are looking at the white house and its okay but then ray says "bro I am bored" And then with a smirk I said "lets go have fun then" so we went and found cans of paint but thay were from a maid on her lunch break... so we killed her and stashed the body in my pocket then we took the cans of paint and through it on a wall multiple times until secret service guy comes and says "what re you doing?" He takes out a baton and begins beating up and mark and ray... then they scream for help to me because they know I am badass... the secret service guy comes up to me and says " so you are badass huh..." He then wacks me in the head multiple times... but I simply stand there with blood dripping down my face and a creepy, badass smile on my face... I then see fear in his eyes... I then rip his hand off his arm and take the baton from it while he is screaming... then I break his ribs with it one at a time (I know where they are because I was a anatomy major at the time and had sex a lot and was looked up to becauase I had a 425 iq and everyone knew I was super smart and asked me to help them... but then I would just punch them instantly killing them and then the girls would fall in love with me and kill their boyfriends... I never got arrested because I am best friends with the police chief and stole his wife) but back to the story, I broke his ribs one at a time and he screamed in pain and all the secret service came but instead of helping the guy they cheered my name and asked for autographs... I then grabbed the guy by the collar and raised him up, with a bloody smile on my face and said" How dare you interrupt me and my friends fun.... you will fucking die now.... He pleaded and actually confessed all the bad things he did in his life but then I just laughed and said "thats nothing compared to what Ive done..." He then screamed as I squeezed on his neck and broke it, it exploded and there was blood on my face but that made me happy and I laughed maniacally... everybody rose up and clapped and cheered for me... but as that happened... I saw obama at the end of the hall.... I thought to myself "Ill kill the president too... then they will like me even more..." but as I walked up to him with blood all over me... he began rushing towards me and teleported into an alternate univeres... it was bloody forest... I was by blood river when I heard steps coming from behind me... what was seconds felt like months, and then he grabbed me and turned me around... his face was terrifying... bloody and like sonic.exe... he laughed and said " you killed my best bodyguard... now YOU WILL DIE!!!" He threw me and I flew for what must have been miles but then hit the floor... I was dying all bones broken and bleeding from everywhere... but then he appeared again... he crawled on top of me and took his shirt off and began licking me... I dont remember anything else but then I appeared in a hospital where I am now writing this... just as a warning... dont go to obama... he is probably going to kill you...